What Getting Engaged at 19 DIDN'T Stop Me From Doing.

I'm constantly seeing people on Facebook share those blogs about "why you shouldn't get married before you're 25" or the post's about "What every 20 something year old should do before settling down." Well, I'm here to talk about what getting engaged at 19 didn't stop me from doing.

Let's get started:

1.       Finishing College

·         If anything, getting engaged at 19 has pushed me to work harder academically. When Dallas asked my parent’s if he could propose, they had ONE stipulation. I had to finish school before the wedding. Ideally, this would’ve been me getting my bachelor’s degree in Business Administration. As it turns out, I’m getting my Associates in Business Administration instead. (But being married won’t stop me from getting my bachelors degree.)

2.       Having a Social Life with Friends

·         “Getting engaged at 19 sounds a lot like leaving a party at 9 pm.” We’ve all heard that one, and to us who are young and engaged or married, it’s super annoying. I still go out dancing with my friends. I just went out this past weekend to celebrate a friends 21st birthday. I grab lunch, we get our nails done, or we just hang out at their house. Being engaged doesn’t automatically mean you can no longer hang out with your friends.

3.       Having Plans For My Future

·         I don’t look at engagements and marriage as a lockdown. I’ve always had plans for my future. Jobs, vacations, memories, everything that I’ve ever seen myself doing, I still do while being engaged, and I will while being married. The difference? Now I have someone by my side through it all, to enjoy all the career changes, vacations, memories with. I have my best friend there. What’s better than experiencing all of life’s joys with your best friend? Nothing!

4.       Being my age!

·         I’m almost 21. I’m in the prime of my life (or so everyone tells me.) I’m a college kid, I stay up late, I sleep in late. I eat too much fast food, I listen to my music loud. I go to work, I use social media more than I should. I see my friends. Do I party? No. I personally don’t, because I never have. It’s not my thing. The only difference between the “average” 19-20 year old and myself is, I’m engaged. I’m going to be a wife in about 10 months. I’ll no longer be 19 or 20. I’ll be 21 and living with my husband, my best friend. I’ll go to work like I do now, we’ll pay our bills together, we’ll cook dinner, we'll go out with friends, and we’ll live our life together. It’s no different than what most people do at 26+. It’s just looked upon as “unacceptable.”

5.       Not looking at those who don’t want to be engaged/married by 21 differently.

·         Lastly, getting engaged at 19 and (I will be) married at 21, hasn’t made me look at others any differently. I don’t judge you because you don’t make the same choices in life as me. Because ultimately, that’s what they are. MY life choices, and yours are YOURS. Interesting concept, I know! Everyone is different, and we all have different paths in life. Does yours make you better than mine? Absolutely not. If you want to wait to get married until you’re 35, GO FOR IT! If you want to get married at 18, GO FOR IT!

I asked a few of my twitter followers, who were also engaged at 19 what their responses to this question would be as well, here are a few of their answers…

“

Being engaged at 19 didn’t stop me from seeking to truly discover exactly who I am. We’re young & we will change. We’ll evolve as people, and we know that. Because we know that, we learn about new things together.  It didn’t stop me from finding myself.” –Hope

“Well, it didn’t stop me from having friends. Like, I felt as if people still wanted to be friends with me. It didn’t take over my life. I still made great grades, and I got a job. It didn’t make me want to have kids right away, either. I still want to accomplish goals. I could go on and on!” –Emily

“The main one that pops into my mind is parties! We just do them together now instead of separately. It’s like a permanent buddy. The other would be spending money. I feel a lot of people think you can’t spend money if you’re engaged for some reason. We spend money separately and together, we just ask each other first. It also didn’t stop me from finding my own identity. I still wanted to be me and figure out who I wanted to be as an adult.” –Brittany

“Everyone is always joking about being “old and married.” Meanwhile, Jordan and I love going to concerts and staying out all night dancing, traveling to new places- like going to DC just randomly. Plus, beach trips, and we even paid off his car and got me a new one. Not to mention I, of course, got my degree.” -Kristen

The way I look at it is, I met Dallas when I was 17 years old. We met totally by chance.

Is our relationship perfect? Far from it. Is it strong? Absolutely.  We’ve grown together. From me being a 17 year old high school student, to me almost finished with college. Him switching a few jobs, and both of us trying to find our place as individuals but as well as a couple.

My soon to be Mother-In-Law has told me a few times “your 20’s are the hardest years of your life. You’re trying to figure out exactly who you are, while constantly being thrown new challenges.”

There is no doubt in my mind that God brought us together. He has a plan for us.

He has a plan for everyone.

God's plan for us was that we get engaged at 19 & 21, and we get married at 21 & 23.

This isn’t His plan for everyone, and that’s okay!

His plan is for us to get through our “Terrible 20’s” together, all the while making them NOT so terrible!

To be the rock for the other, to have a shoulder to cry on, to have someone to tell good news to, and someone to cherish every moment of life’s blessings with.

The main point of this post was to stress how unimportant age is. If you’re happy, in love, and your relationship can stand through the trials and tribulations that life may throw at you… Who is to say two individuals, whether they're 19 or 49, shouldn’t unite as one to become man and wife? 

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” - Genesis 2:24